I leave today to go to Noble Valley for two weeks. Well, MariBeth is going with me, too. Before we left Oxford, we all went to my parents' house for breakfast. My mother insisted. She said, "I won't be seeing my girls for a month. I need spend some time with you all before you all leave me here with all these men." My father talked to Hobert most of the morning. I couldn't even get 5 minutes with either of them. God grief.

When I did get Hobert away from my father, I took him up to the attic to show him my old play chest. I used to play dress up a lot when I was younger. I used to make my brother's play with me, too. I looked through the chest. I can't believe that my mother has kept that thang all these years. We tried on the outfits for awhile. He actually looked handsome in one of my father's old hats that I had in the chest.

Quick Confession

I have been suppressing my feelings for Hobert. Every time, I felt something, I would brush it out of my mind. I don't want to be ready to feel what I felt for that nut (my EX). On Saturday, my Aunt-T told me to quit being scared to feel something for men. She also asked me how long I was going to let one idiot ruin the rest of my life. I told myself that I wasn't going to be scared anymore.

***

I watched Hobert try to imitate my father as he tried on the outfits from my play chest. He was funny, but he couldn't imitate my father as good as MariBeth could. I just stared at Hobert and let myself feel something for him. It caught me off guard because I felt something. I didn't even try to stop it. I just let myself feel. Before I realized what was happening, tears were coming from my eyes. When Hobert realized I was crying, he came over to me and hugged me. I lay in his arms and cried for awhile. He never asked me why I was crying. That was fine with me, too. I didn't want to try to explain it to him.

This is going to be okay.

Labels: 2006